Who Knows?

Who Knows?

I write this in the wake of a revelation concerning a well-known Christian government leader who fell into sin. The announcements indicate that he had been caught in an ‘inappropriate relationship’ with another member of parliament, and had continued in it in spite of admonishment. This leader has since resigned from all his government positions and membership in his party. News of this came like a shock wave that reverberated throughout the church and the nation. Few knew about what had happened until the public announcement. A third of the year has gone by. The recent Lent season leading to Good Friday reminds us to keep our eyes on the Cross and Christ crucified for us. We also lift our eyes to see Christ risen and coming for us.

The name of our Lord has been muddied, and there is profound disappointment felt in the Church today. One can only imagine what his family must be feeling now; They are the unseen victims of this tragedy.

This is a time to mourn.

As I reflect on this grievous sorrow, I can’t help thinking about how one can be so popular and active in the public square, and yet conceal such a dark secret.

I can have a glowing public life. Speaking to crowds, featured in magazines, and feted on social media. But in my private life, the things I do in secret - who knows?

I can be famous for the good that I do: Serving the poor and needy, championing the rights of the oppressed and forgotten. Launching new ministries. A prophet for our time. A leader. And the crowds can be amazed at all the good that I can do, and my enemies silenced all the same. But deep inside – who knows?

I could be admired for how I’ve given my life to others, and somehow manage to take care of my family life, my inner life. We assume that one can do so much only because one’s private life has been set in order – or we may even say that one has an ‘anointing’. But who knows?

It is merely the case for public figures that when their struggles and failures are exposed, the whole world will find out and the impact is greater. But this capacity for deceit (for we are surely lying to ourselves) lies within each of us. No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.

We all know how to hide. It was the sin that followed quickly after Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit.

I feel very much for this now as a pastor. Every Sunday, correction: every day, I am looked upon and expected to speak, to serve, to act blamelessly in every way. To be a man of God. It is so tempting to make it all a show.

Professing humility can be made into a show – for the first thing about it is not to be thinking so much about myself. To profess a love for God can also be a show – for in saying such things I may be vying with God for attention. When is the living real or fake… who knows?

It can even happen at home with my wife and children. It can seem much harder to hide things at home, but it can also be much easier. Who knows? Who knows?

We have turned hiding into an art.

No one can really see when we struggle to keep too many balls in the air, but keep at it as we get egged on by the cheers and jeers. No one, but God.

No one can examine our hearts and find that moment when we justify to ourselves that we are doing a whole lot of good, and lots of people are looking up to me, and therefore I can’t stop now. No one, but God.

No one can see the moments when we choose to disregard His voice – when we stop up our ears and harden our hearts. No one, but God.

And so, if there are 3 things I ask for now, it would be for these:

The virtue of honesty;

The urgency to invite others to hold me accountable;

And most of all, the fear of the Lord.

He knows.

Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall. 1 Corinthians 10:12

Written 19 Jul 2023

Pastor Ng Zhi-wen

Zion Bishan BP Church